Why I am not Charlie Hebdo

  Why I am not Charlie Hebdo

Gaza, January, If you haven’t heard about the "Paris attacks" you probably have been living in a parallel universe. And if you did, then you probably didn’t hear about the police officer Ahmad Merabet, a Muslim, who died while trying to defend Charlie Hebdo even though they were insulting his religion.

#JesuisCharlie hashtag took over the world and the cyber sphere, people from around the world rushed to show their support to Charlie and ofcourse took a chance to attack Muslims spewing all kinds of profanities and racial commentary. A campaign to #KillAllMuslims was launched by those who support Charlie, ironically. They think violence is the answer to violence. How ignorant can people be is beyond me.

Muslims, as usual, rushed to declare their innocence by trending the #NotinMyName hashtag that is trending often since Islam and Muslims are constantly under the microscope.

I am not Charlie, nor did I participate in the #JeSuisCharlie phenomena. I also didn’t participate in the “Not in my name” campaign as a Muslim. Why you ask? I will tell you.

Lets me start by saying that the world doesn’t think all lives equally matter. I condemn Paris attacks. Yes, I think of Charlie as a racist who manipulates Satire into insulting religions to get his few minutes of fame and become a hero. However, I don’t believe that violence is the solution and I condemn Paris attacks. Killing 12 people doesn’t help, did it ever? No. It never did. Islam never asked us to kill in its name. ISIS are already doing enough to deform Islam and make it look like a religion that is based on terrorism, we don’t need to add to that. Even if the world denies me of all freedoms, I still strongly believe in them and support them.

Murders, killings and crimes are committed every day by people from different nationalities, backgrounds and religions but they are never labeled or narrowed down to a certain race or religion unless they are Black, Arab or Muslim. If you are all three, then you will probably be a suspect even if you did nothing and happened to be passing by an incident.

I will not defend myself or my religion simply because not every individual represents their nationality or religion. Some people are stupid and they do mistakes. Stupidity and terrorism have no religion. So blame the person not their background. And judge yourself before you judge others because you are not perfect and if you feel like all Muslims should be killed because two Muslims committed a crime, then you are no better.

I am perplexed by a world that is so biased. Where were those who defended rights, freedoms and journalism when Israel was blowing Gaza up killing children and journalists? Where were they when Muslims were going through mass killings in Burma? Or is the European blood more worthy than other blood? Or are freedoms exclusive to Europe only and shouldn’t be defended everywhere else as well? Or are Muslims and Islam easy targets and speaking up against Israel is a taboo?

I stood with Paris against the attacks even though Paris didn’t stand by me or Gaza. They tried hard to oppress and prevent protests in our support when Israel was burning Gaza and the government stood still. Yet, I am the one who need to be defending myself as a Muslim? Why? And how is that fair?

I am not Charlie. Je Suis pas Charlie. Je Suis Gaza, Je Suis Muslim, Je Suis Palestinien, Je Suis Palestine and Je Suis Ahmed. I am Gaza, I am Muslim, I am Palestinian, I am Palestine , I am Ahmed and that doesn’t mean I am a terrorist. I will not defend myself because I did nothing. I stood by Paris yet France only recently and symbolically recognized Palestine. So for the past 26 years of my life I didn’t exist in France’s eyes. Yet I support Paris. Because I am a human being, a Muslim, Arab and Palestinian. I don’t condone the killing of innocent people and I support all freedoms and equality, yup, believe it or not. My dream is ultimate freedom and equality.

I will never be like Charlie but I would definitely look forward of being equal to Charlie. When I feel like my life matters, my blood is worthy, when I live in an equal world that will stand by me like I am willing to stand by it. When the world recognizes that I exist and gives me my rights. When people defend all innocent people the same. I will be Charlie when I find any authenticity in what he does and in the world we live in.

From Gaza with dreams of peace and equality,

Omar Ghraieb

Gaza: The Hunger Games

The Art of Surviving

Little did the millions who watched “The Hunger Games” film series know that a similar reality actually exists, its not a fictional realm that the creator came up with. Yes, its called “Gaza”. A beautiful little coastal enclave that the least adjectives you can use to describe it are those like “impoverished”, “suffocating” and “Primal”. A little place on the map that suffers from an Israeli imposed siege and is always tightly sealed by Egypt. We can safely and accurately say that Gaza is the biggest modern open-air prison.

You might go through a dilemma or two in your life, but if you live in Gaza, your mere existence is a dilemma in itself. Your life is like a Marionette except its extra polarized and the strings pull you in different directions.

You are expected to aspire for better and higher education, yet thanks to Israel and Egypt you’ll need 10 miracles to get out of Gaza to seek such education. Palestinians are among the most educated and clever nations, we land scholarships so easily (which is supposed to be the hardest part) but visa and border issues always halts the process. Your dream is murdered, sometimes repeatedly.

You read serious reports made by NGOs like UNRWA who say that Gaza wont be livable by 2020, population will grow and life will decline. Many other reports mention the high rates of poverty, water pollution and scarcity, weak infrastructure, unemployment rates skyrocketing, inflation in the population and diseases widespread (like cancer).

Then comes the regular Israeli attacks on Gaza, plus the daily violation of the air space that usually leads to a major headache after all the buzzing and hovering over on low altitudes. People injured or killed, buildings are destroyed, blood is spilled and life is disturbed.

The whole world expected the “Arab Spring” to “blossom” in Palestine, or more particularly, in Gaza. Palestinians living in Gaza have turned into numb robots who are always judged, attacked and bossed around by every other country\nation.

We are asked to topple Hamas. What then? Settle with the PA? No, topple the PA too. Ok, but don’t forget that our main concern is ending the occupation. Yeah, we are expected to also topple the occupation. Wait, so we should end the internal Palestinian division, then topple both factions, then free Palestine? All that while we are hated, judged and attacked by the Egyptian media on a daily basis, which is starting to affect the Egyptian people who are now hating on those who live in Gaza, only because Hamas rules Gaza. Hmmm, collective punishment comes to my mind here, similar to Israel’s way in dealing with Palestinians. Interesting.

Oh, and let’s not forget how we are always judged by the international community. Every Palestinian living in Gaza is considered to be a Hamas member (terrorist) just because it’s the ruling regime, even those who didn’t vote for Hamas, which is highly and very inaccurate and wrong. Nearly two million people reside in Gaza, how is it fair to assume that all of them are Hamas?

As if Gaza isn’t separated enough from the West Bank, and we already feel the internal division and Israeli siege and separation, you have those who live comfortably and safely in their homes abroad and yet sit behind a screen to tell you that Gaza isn’t occupied. Yeah, Israel withdrew, ok, but Israel has a siege imposed and attacks Gaza whenever they have free time or extra fuel. Whatever you say, those people wont change their minds, they don’t know the kind of life you are living.

The US promises and swears to always be Fidus Achates with Israel. Hence AIPAC and all the Israeli domination and prominence. But who will support Palestinians if they aren’t even capable of supporting themselves or each others?

Lets put all that aside for a minute. Lets analyze the daily life here. Due to the high poverty and unemployment rates, people are occupied by making a living. If I had to pick one thing that stands out as the main common factor between Palestinians here in Gaza, or in Palestine, its going to be "HARD WORK". Yes, they just want to earn a living, no matter what it takes.

Rich, middle class, poor and homeless people are always busy making a living or thinking of ways to secure money and put food on the table even if its through street begging. Yes, even rich people here aren’t safe. Plus, those who actually afford to “live a little” rarely do because they are either afraid of the future or feeling guilty. Guilt springs from the horrible situation that explodes by the minute and its all before your eyes.

We are\were slowly trained to adjust to any living situation, no matter how bad it gets. Guinea pigs? Yes. We are opened to any situation. You might think it’s a positive thing, but if you don’t grasp the seriousness of this issue and how dangerous it is, then you’ll never get it. It’s the main reason behind us settling with being mediocre and thinking its okay. Well, its not okay.

We go through daily power outages, 8-12 hours cut, and that’s during the good days. We went through three weeks of no electricity during Israel’s first full-blown war on Gaza. Our sea is polluted with sewage water, so the water is also polluted. You can put two and two together and imagine how all of this highly affects and complicates every aspect of life.

Those who appreciate the beauty and nature of Gaza, or love the “Arts” and decide to defy their families and society by choosing such an understated field that generates no money, are usually ridiculed or accused of living in denial. You find yourself lost between feeling guilty of being hopeful and seeing the bright side, instead of being obsessed 24\7 with the ugliness of the details of life here. God forbid you say Gaza is beautiful, people will say you have gone mad. Even you, in your own mind, you scold yourself for believing in the obvious yet ignoring the common dark side of this same obviousness.

We are resilient. Life doesn’t stop here. But we don’t realize how much we are paying for this resilience. A very high price, in such a harsh era we live in. We are losing our humanity. We are becoming rude, inconsiderate and cutthroat. I wish this was a desultory fact, but it isn’t. We are detaching and becoming despondent. We are becoming less human and more animal-like who are only bothered by surviving in the forest.

If you yearn for a normal life in Gaza, you are in big trouble. Life can never be normal here, and if you try and live a normal life, you’ll be abnormal. People will judge you and make you feel less patriotic or passionate about your country. If you ever craved traveling for vacation, forget it, both Erez and Rafah are journeys from hell, assuming ofcourse you were lucky enough to have 10 miracles that might secure you a chance of exit.

If you yearn to Jerusalem, then wait till you are 50, or till you are very sick or you are blessed with a good job at one of Gaza’s many useless NGO’s who milk the Palestinian cause and launch huge donation campaigns with no real effect on ground. Or else, Israel won’t let you past Erez.

If you have best friends in the West Bank, then plan a meeting in any country but Palestine, for a chance to see them, only if Egypt has Rafah opened and you are okay with humiliation and being treated like a herd of sheep.

If you live in Gaza and you want to excel, then good luck and may God be on your side. With very few opportunities around, little resources and no major organization to support you, the competition is really high, like really really high and super tough, cutthroat. You have to shine brighter than the sun to be recognized.

If you live in Gaza, you realize that you CAN NOT live in it and you CAN NOT live out of it. When you are in, you will yearn to go out, and when you are out you will die to get back in to your family and your land. You are destined to a polarizing life. You are required to master the art of survival.

If you live in Gaza, you should smile and move on, but hold on very tightly to your humanity and everything that makes you the way you are. Live, love, be happy and be sad. See the obvious, with all its colors\shades\sides. Try to be a bit normal, but be clever enough to recognize that you will never be completely normal. Be humane, be you and be strong. Lets survive, without turning our surroundings into a jungle. Lets keep dreaming of a better world.

With love,

Omar Ghraieb

As I turn 25 today: 25 things I am grateful for

As I turn 25 today: 25 things I am grateful for

Gaza, February 28, I would start with expressing how much I like my birthday's date but I would sound self centered. And I am not here to sound self-centered; I am here to announce my decision to bathe in gratitude this year on my birthday. I reached 25 today and although I have MUCH MORE than 25 things to be grateful for, I will choose my best 25.

My close friends have seen how tangible my transformation has been, but for those who don’t know me: I have changed allot along the past few months. 2011, was a year that I will never forgot. It was revolutionary in every sense that this meaning can hold, leaders were toppled, people demanded their freedom, horrendous bloodsheds and it was a clear sign that the world is changing. 

Apparently, I was following that trend “Un-intentionally”. I ended up changing too. Sometimes, I don’t even recognize my past self. Don’t get me wrong, the real Omar is still there and the old Omar is still camping on me but the new Omar is a spontaneous operation that started happening and still is.

I like 25 –Not because the numbers are nice or it’s the half of 50 and all this crap-, I like 25 because I can honestly say that now: I know myself a little better, I know the world a little better, I know god a little better, I know what I want a little better and I know you a little better. I appreciate things more, I enjoy things more, I no longer tolerate drama or people’s crap and I no longer seek validation from people who just wanna use me. I am becoming who I am, I am meant to be and I want to be. For me, this is big.

I was frightened to death from this transformation because as Maya Angelou once said: “If you know better, you would\should\could do better”, she is right. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to do better if I knew better but GLADLY I was wrong. I try and will try to do better now that I know better, and I will always seek more knowledge to know better so I can do better even if that scares the crap out of me. I was also afraid because my change will upset many close people to my heart –and it did- and I might lose them but it will be their choice –and it is- not mine. He\she who doesn’t accept me for who I am, doesn’t deserve me –This is my new mantra-.

Ok time to shut up now and state the 25 things I thank god for –No matter how much I thank god it will never be enough for he has given me endless blessings, gifts and things to be grateful for-, here we go:

1-      My faith and how it gets 10 times stronger after a little weakness.

2-      My Vulnerability that keeps me grounded, human, humble and grateful.

3-      My family because you might lose anything but you will never lose your family.

4-      My mom who passed away when I was 9 but lived in my heart since then, she planted in me seeds that will always grow, which means she will always be with me J love you mom.

5-      Nano and his upcoming brother\sister (Adnan Abdullah a.k.a. Nano who is my nephew and the best gift that god and dareen –my sister- gave me).

6-      Ziad, My best friend. Because no matter what happens, we will always watch each other’s backs and be there for each other.

7-      All my friends (class mates, social media friends, university friends, ALL MY FRIENDS EVERYWHERE because every1 of them made a difference in my life).

8-      My Grandma who raised me like a son and a grandchild and was always there for me. <3

9-      My life in Cyprus Island that might not be long but left positive precipitations that will stay forever with me and made a huge impact on my personality.

10-   Being Palestinian because I would wanna be Palestinian if I wasn’t. I would be a different person if I wasn’t Palestinian. It made me who I am now.

11-   Palestine because this entity and existence taught me love, existence, UNARMED resistance and LIFE.

12-   Writing because the gift of writing gave me the ability to slowly discover myself and my voice and more importantly have my voice heard and express myself freely. And poetry, because it helped give my imaginations so many other and renewable dimensions.

13-   Latin Patriarchate School and Holly family school because the 1st gave me the best years of my childhood life with the best friends, teachers and school ever. And the 2nd meant the transformation from childhood to adolescence and a whole new phase with the same awesome friends and teachers.

14-   Social media for helping us reach out to people, participate in global revolutions and spread the truth about Palestine and Gaza.

15-   Gaza. Imagine you were walking in a gallery and a breathtaking portrait caught your eye and you couldn’t stop looking at it. Infact, you kept coming everyday to just look at it. Well, I live in this portrait J

16-   My love for pets and animals in General because it made me more humane, hating animals can turn a person into a cruel monster. I said “CAN”, please don’t hold that against me.

17-   A little more knowledge everyday, because knowledge is power.

18-   My English language because it made my life 100 times easier than other people here in Gaza.

19-   My family’s financial status that enabled me to study at good schools, universities and be able to do some of the things that I like even though we aren’t rich. My financial status, I am not rich yet I am independent and I get to live how I want to live and do most of the things I like.

20-   My integrity that helped me make numerous friends for life without needing anything from them. Thank you god, Thank you god and Thank you god.

21-   My love for art, culture and music that introduced color to my life, without these things my life would be black and white à BORING “in my personal opinion about my life, you might be living a black and white life and enjoying it” J

22-   My laptop. My first big purchase and my best investment because it was the gate for priceless things and moments. It means allot to me.

23-   My humanity that enables my heart ache whenever I see a child crying, an elder suffering, an animal hurting, injustice ruling, oppression camping and Palestine bleeding.

24-   Change. The change that happened to me, to the world and my ability to spot positive change; seek positive change, work for a better change and thrive for a better change.

25-   Kareem. For being in my life as a second dad, friend, mentor, a person who is brutally honest with me, knows me very well, always there for me no matter what, incorporates me in his family, sets me straight, listens to me and offers me unconditional fatherly love.

Ok that’s all folks. Feel free to tell me what you are grateful for, why did you wake up smiling today? What do you wanna thank god for? …etc.

I wanna also thank you all for being a part of my birthday.

With love, gratitude, respect and hugs,

Omar from Gaza

Gratitude is not only the greatest of all virtues, but the parent of all others - Cicero